...Professional Wrestling Was Popular?

When I began this blog (a whole two days ago) one of the first "remember whens" what popped into my mind was..."Remember wrestling?" It is such a strong memory for me, thinking of girls and boys from grade school constantly talking about their favorite wrestlers from the match the night before. Since I was never a part of that entire phase, I decided to call in an expert for my first guest post. Below is my friend Mallory's take on the fascination with the World Wrestling Federation....


"The real question here is, 'Remember when professional wrestling was actually entertaining?'

I do. I grew up watching professional wrestling, and I was strictly a World Wrestling Federation (now World Wrestling Entertainment) fan. This meant that at just about the age when kids start developing vivid memories, I was collecting memories of wrestlers such as every little kid’s hero, Bret the Hitman Hart; the scariest man alive (or dead…?), the Undertaker; the CRAZIEST person I have ever watched, Mankind (real name Mick Foley, a man who happens to be an amazing author); the weirdest man perhaps ever employed by the WWE, Goldust; and, my personal and all-time favorite, the Heart Break Kid Shawn Michaels. So, growing up watching these guys meant that I grew older watching people who truly had a way with words: people like The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, and every member – excluding Chyna and X-Pac, but certainly including Jesse James and Billy Gunn – of Degeneration X.

The difference between these men and your wrestlers of today? The difference is that back when wrestling was GOOD, you didn’t have to be huge. People like Bret Hart simply were not big guys, but they had … well, they had heart. They were able to wrestle in 60-minute Iron Man matches where there was not a boring moment to be seen. Back in the day, you had to have a way with the fans that made them feel passionately about you, whether they loved you or hated you. And most importantly, you had to LOVE the industry.

Wrestling fans may be looked at as a bunch of slack-jawed yokels, but they can tell who is in the wrestling business for love as opposed to money. They can tell who is genuine.

Nowadays, being a huge guy can get you ahead in the business. And that is why people just don’t watch wrestling like they used to. There is no one that can make you hate him like The Rock could. There is no one that can make you giggle at his misfortunes and shortcomings like Kurt Angle could (pre-domestic violence arrest). There is no one who you could, as my younger sister once put it, “listen to for two straight hours and not get sick of hearing,” like Stone Cold. There is no one as downright bizarre as Goldust was. And there is no one, no one, that can fly (fly!) into the ring before a match and make a 9-year-old girl sitting in her living room in Delaware think, 'I’d hit that,' like the Heart Break Kid could.



But, just like life, the world of professional wrestling goes on. You can turn on WWE Monday Night Raw just like always, but now, instead of getting The Rock and Stone Cold serenading each other with bizarre versions of 'Margaritaville' or DX telling an opponent they have two words for him ('SUCK IT'), you get beefed up piles of steroids and boring.

And so, I’ll keep – and enjoy – my memories and VHS tapes of the guys who loved wrestling just as much as I, and millions of other fans, loved watching them. We miss you."

Thanks, Mal!

....Tyra Banks Loved Vaseline?

Tyra Banks recently announced that her show will be closing its doors. This instantly brought me back to a magical time, a time....of Vaseline. The video honestly speaks for itself.





Mental breakdown? Theatrical effect? Good Acting? No one really knows for sure. The point is...


Remember When Tyra Banks Convinced Her Audience Vaseline Was a Good Giveaway?


Goodbye, Tyra. Don't worry, maybe someday there's a career in...Vaseline.

...New Years Meant Watching Dick Clark With Your Parents?

For the past several years, December 31st has been nothing but a disappointment. While most revel in the idea of a fresh start, free from the year's mistakes, shortcomings, and calories, I find nothing remotely refreshing about the clock turning midnight. New Years is always wildly overrated, supposedly a huge party night filled with magic and rainbows and midnight kisses, but the truth is most people don't experience this. I am no exception. I can't remember the last time I actually experienced an actually GREAT New Years Eve. This year was no different. In fact, you might say this year was one of the worst New Years in a long time. But that's neither here nor there. My point is...


Remember When... New Years Eve Meant Watching the Ball Drop with a Young(er), Healthy Dick Clark With Your Parents and Banging Pots At Midnight In The Middle Of The Street, Freezing But Wildly Optimistic About The Coming Year?


I miss that.